Saturday, February 26, 2005

posted by: copernicus on 2/26/2005 10:27:00 AM
Well, this is my last night of work.

The mon-fri crew took me out after work last night for alcohol, laughter and tales of titties, lesbianism and how we all used to be potheads. Funny how I learned more about some of the people I work with on my last day than I knew in the previous 3 months. Must have been the tequila.

Tonight I'll say gooodbye to all my patients and the weekend staff. I have some favorite patients that I'll really miss. There's a couple of old ladies with Alzheimer's that flirt with me all the time. Whenever the CNA's (especially the female ones) are having trouble with them they come get me. I turn on the charm, their moods change to smiles and the problem is resolved.

There's a couple of male patients I'll miss too. One is this old guy that thinks he's still a mack, and flirts with the females all the time. Doesn't matter if she's a patient or employee, he's not picky. The other one is a guy in his mid 20's who's a quadrapelegic. He's got all the girls @ work in his pocket. Everyone of them dotes on him and calls him their boyfriend. Smug little shit works it, too. He's got them on rotation. Some of them even come sit and visit with him when their not working.

Tomorrow my girlfriend's taking the bus up here to help me pack up and move out. We'll get the car loaded & apartment cleaned up, go have a good dinner, a few drinks at the mullet-bar that's been my after-work-sociology-experiment the last 3 months (she insists on seeing it) and make the drive back to Brooklyn monday morning.

Ok, that's it for now. Gotta get in a nap before work.

I'll close with a joke I heard from a patient of mine, a 99 year old retired nurse. Picture this coming from the mouth of a 4'10, 80 lb. woman who's almost 100:

--"What the difference between and enema and a douche?"

--"About an inch."