Monday, February 02, 2004

posted by: copernicus on 2/02/2004 12:58:00 AM
NEW YEAR’S

John walked outside (where I was engaged in the constant exercise of galactic positioning recognition) and said
“I don’t think you realize this, so I’m just going to say it. Why don’t you get off your ass and become an astrophysicist? I’ve been finding you outside a lot lately, looking at the stars and planets, and it occurred to me that you need to go back to fucking school and start teaching. You know you’re perfect for it because you can’t let yourself beat down anybody. You see too much potential in people to let yourself hate them. You identify a piece of something that someone has in them and you try to amplify it while teaching them how to bring it out themselves. You don’t know it yet, but that’s where you’ll end up.”

I said, “How can I teach when I know so little?”

He snapped, “Don’t give me that Socratic bullshit.”

I said, “I’m serious, I’m a galactic fucking embryo, how can I justify assuming a position of authority?”

He was opening the door to go back in to the party, and he paused with his hand on the handle. He looked at me over his left shoulder and said, “Because you’ve already seen what was necessary! (I thought, if I’ve seen what was necessary, how do you deal with your overdose?) Now pick up you’re fucking toolbox which now contains the basic tools, and use them to build more elaborate and appropriate ones,…..DICKHEAD!”

I thought about that for a moment and said, “Thanks brother, I’ll be in in a minute.”

As I looked back up at the sound of the door closing, a cloud passed in front of the moon and a chilly gust brought the music of winter branches to the night silence.

I was back outside in 10 minutes.

12-31-97
Lawrence, Kansas